I've been busy this last week and I'm learning patience like always. I thought I was a pretty patient guy until the mission and every time I finish a challenge on patience I think "Wow I'm getting this down!" but then the Lord shows me that I need to learn MORE patience.. and I'm just like.. WHEN will I finally be finished learning this whole patience thing?! I just want to have patience NOW!! (ha! ha!) okay so maybe I still need to learn a lot more patience.
I'm doing good with my Spanish and can communicate and understand fairly well.. well more so understand. I can communicate fine it's just when I get into the topics that are different than Gospel that I just don't know the words. I hope that changes by the end of two years.. well I hope I can perfect my Spanish in the next 3 months cause I'd really like to get thrown into the Polochic soon and start Q'eqchi cause I feel like that will be harder to fully grasp and I want to also be fluent in that.. and Russian, sign language, French, Latin and maybe Italian but for now these two languages are enough to occupy my time.
So I'm finding the hardest thing for me is to go easy on myself. Like I am fully aware that I am not perfect and I want to be.. and so I put up expectations that aren't achievable and never meet them.. making it harder to accept who I am and making me feel like a poor missionary. Well I know I'm not a bad missionary but I'm finding it hard to think I'm even a good missionary. Don't worry though I hope I can figure it out.. Two baptisms isn't horrible for a missionary.. even if they WERE ready before I got there.
I'll just say that I'm trying.. but I wont say I've never been disanimated (discouraged). I find it hard when you're in an area that is extremely hard cause honestly there are days that I don't want to work either! but I push through them with the hope that something will click soon and I'll know everything and be a perfect missionary and like Amman baptize 1000's.
On that note I'll leave you! Love you all and sadly every once in a while I end up missing you.. Especially my family!
Yours fortunately,
---Elder Hyrum Clark
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